31 Dec 2013

Giving Up Facebook

So I'm giving up Facebook for a month, starting from tonight. I know, how will I cope, I hear you ask? I am a fully paid up FB addict - always on chat/commenting/liking/sharing/posting and notifying the world of my (or more like Baby45's) every bowel movement.

Why am I giving it up? Well, I think it is taking up too much of my time. I haven't blogged regularly for almost two years now - and yes, the small toddler shaped hole in my time is partially responsible but also, I haven't gotten anywhere with this year's Nanowrimo book that I've written 4k of. However mostly it's because there are a lot of people - off and on Facebook - that I've not properly maintained an "IRL" relationship with for some time now - even years in some cases.

I think Social Media - and Facebook in particular - has made me sloppy when it comes to friendships. Don't get me wrong, I couldn't be without my LNMC crew and my other friends on chat and Facebook who have gotten me through the changes of the last few years. No, it's more that I feel I am not giving enough or doing enough with those friends who - understandably - don't just want to be broadcast to.

I feel a little like I'm saying, let's not chat properly about what's happening, just go check out my facebook page - you can see what Baby45 had for lunch, that I shared several "totes cray cray" Buzzfeed lists and a blurry selfie. Wow, scintillating isn't it. I'm arrogantly assuming that people are just that interested.Where is the depth to the relationships, how am I giving something back? A quick "happy birthday lovely xxx" on a wall doesn't replace a card, a gift, a coffee or a call. Instead it just shows that Facebook reminded me.

I am exaggerating a touch here, I greatly value the convenience of Facebook to keep in touch with friends and family across the world, to contribute to groups where I can help other mums, to arrange parties and playdates. But this is a wake up call to me to really cherish the people who are important to me in 2014 - and beyond.  And by that I don't mean a quick mass BCC email tomorrow saying "let's me up for a coffee" and that being all.

No, this year, there will be coffees, cocktails, playdates, swim classes, picnics, parties, day trips but also long emails, phone calls and even, letters. Proper birthday cards and catch ups. I don't expect to just pick up where I left off with friendships, they'll need to built back up again, that takes time. But hopefully without Facebook taking up so much time, I'll be able to do that.

Thank you and goodnight,

Stupidgirl has left the building x