23 Jan 2011

Does it offend you yeah - Top 10 Irritating Things List

Sorry, love that band name! So, evening everyone, hope you've had great weekends. I am in a rather excitable mood after being featured in the Independent (photo as well, eeep) talking about why I love my library. Read all about it here!

I know I've blogged + pimped out the blog a lot on Twitter recently, so thanks for all your continued support + hope you like what you're reading - it certainly seems like it. I've got an exciting couple of interviews coming up in the next week or so, plus a photo essay and the WoTW is going to be.......kindness.

So, on with the list - thanks to @AliaMcK for helping me compile it. (PS If you missed last week's top 10 funny websites, check it out here)

Top 10 Things That Irritate The Hell Out of Me

1) People who cannot use public transport properly
By this I mainly mean people who do not understand the concept of moving down inside the bus/tube/carriage/tram and just stand there, oblivious to everyone else needing to get on + get to work. This leads to someone (usually big mouth me) shouting in a very posh voice "Could you move down PLEASE!". The person blocking the way then usually pulls a `who, me?` type face, whilst everyone else looks at them in a `yes, you moron` way. Then they move. Also within this category, people waiting to get on the tube/train/bus blocking the exits when you want to get off (wtf is this all about) and people who don't understand the concept of paying for a ticket. It's not hard.
**this point excludes tourists, who can't necessarily be expected to know these things**

2) People who have no manners/lack of common courtesy
These are the people who do not even acknowledge, let alone respond to emails/texts/tweets/voicemails even after a reasonable amount of time has expired (I do appreciate that not everyone is quite as obsessive about being online as moi). Also in this, people who don't say please or thank you when you hold doors open for them. And at a slight tangent to the lack of emailing/texts, people who can't use the correct form of its/it's or they're/there/their or who's/whose. LOOK IT UP. We have spell check and online grammar tools. Check before sending! This particularly goes for people who are trying to sell me something. Why should I buy something from you when you can't even be bothered to use spell check?

3) Really slow computers
You know, those days when your laptop/PC/whatever just goes "You know what, no. Just, no. I am not going to open a single programme without taking at least half a century, freezing, crashing and losing all your work." And this leaves me in an impotent rage, on hold to my IT desk (husbando), shouting at an inanimate object, looking like a crazy bag lady. It's not elegant folks but I'm not alone on this one right?!

4) Have something stuck in your teeth....
That you just can't extract without maximum public embarrassment OR getting home and finding out you walked around all day with something HUGE in your teeth and no one telling you (ditto for open flies, skirt tucked in tights/knickers). Small on the scale of stuff on this list but oh so grrrrrrrr

5) People who don't understand the concept of supermarket checkouts
In this category I include:

  • the people who look surprised when it comes to pay + take about three decades to find their purse/wallet/nectar card. This is after queuing for around 30 minutes. Do these people never go out and purchase things? WTF is up with this behaviour?
  • the people who decide that the 10 items or less checkout queue rule does not apply to them and they can barge in there with their 25 tins of cat food and 9 bottles of sparkling water that then takes the cashier freakin ages to bag
  • inattentive checkout assistants/shop assistants. I am the customer, you serve me, I come to pay, you do not continue chatting away on your mobile phone whilst taking and then messing up my food order. You also do not look pissed off that I interrupted your very important gossip with the other shop assistants when I need something else in my size. I've worked in a shop, I know the pay is shit, I know that people are rude to you but FFS please just do your job at least. It's not my fault if you hate it!
6) That getting dressed for work laundry conundrum (kudos to Alia for help with this one!)
You know, it's monday morning, you go to get your favourite sweater/shirt/dress/trousers/skirt out of the cupboard because it's easy to wear and you don't need to think about matching items...... but the fucker is in the laundry basket because someone (you!) forgot to wash it. Fuckfuckfuck goes your poor tired monday morning head. The clock is ticking on, you've not had a morning beverage and it's pissing with rain. What do you do now? Do you smell it (we've all done that)? Do you just put it on + hope for the best? Do you try to cobble together another outfit whilst every braincell screams "Nooooo it's too early for fashion dilemmas". Whatever the outcome it is just so bloody annoying isn't it!

7) The disappearance of the yummy food
You've had a long day - lots of meetings maybe, or just lots of work. Alternatively you've been out late/up early/you've got a hangover and all you want is that nice glass of juice or....the last biscuit/piece of cake or.... the half a tub of Ben + Jerrys or.....the Chinese take out left overs. Mmmm, perfect you think, just the ticket to make you feel better. 
But no dagnabit! Someone has got there first and they've eaten/drunk the damn thing. There's not even any milk for tea or bread for toast. Arghhhhh if this doesn't give you the rage then you've the patience of a saint!

8) The Daily Fail
I don't think I need to say any more. Just the mere thought of this publication gets my blood pressure going. Along with that I'd like to add the people who read said publication and then think they have the  right to form a solid, intelligent political opinion based on this - and not being aware that they are coming across as ignorant bigots! 
Handy tip - here is a link to an add-on for firefox that when you click on the Fail's website, hides it with pictures of kittens and tea (thanks to Caroline for this one!) 

9) Reality TV Shows
Big Brother, I'm a Celebrity Get me Out of Here, X Factor, Pop Idol, Strictly Coming Dancing, Dancing on Ice, So You Think You Can Dance, Come Dine With Me. 
Just FUCK RIGHT OFF. If there is anything more likely to get me ranting away at my tellybox then it's a reality TV show. I do appreciate that some people like them, I do, and that's their opinion. But generally I flipping hate the shows. I don't give a toss about a bunch of weirdos in a house in North London, neither do I care about slebs fainting/eating spiders/peeing outside. I certainly don't want to watch a bunch of talentless wannabees have their dreams shredded by SyCo. It's so voyeuristic. And yet this week I watched at least 6 episodes of CDWM.

10) The government closing (or trying to) libraries/cutting their funding.
Need I say more? Add your support and stories about why your library is important to you here!

Feel differently about any of these? Want to add your own moments, please comment below - this one could run and run.

As ever thanks for reading and hope to see you again soon.

Thank you and good night.

Stupidgirl has left the building


  1. Loved your list esp No 8 (but how else am I gonna keep up with celeb gossip when I'm in Paris? Even tho I have absiolutely no idea who these celebs are, anyway!)And, don't worry, I read the Guardian online to make sure I have an even balance of political opinion, lol

    Closing of the libraries goes without saying - we must all do everything possible to keep as many open and functioning as possible. Books are eveyone's Best Friend.
    btw particularly liked what John Bird wrote.
    Talking of books - The Hare With The Amber Eyes is absolutely wonderful.Def Book of the Year so READ IT :-)

    Don't stop at people who can't spell. How about punctuation? Maybe when the government realises that the most important things to teach kids are the three Rs -for those who don't know these mean Reading (w)Riting and
    (a)Rithmetic ...and English grammar, by parrot fashion if need be, then there is no hope for your kids' education.

    No 6 no longer applies to moi, thank goodness, but let me tell you..even when it doesn't (ie post menopausal) you'll still panic when wondering what to wear to go out for an evening and the item you think will be fit for purpose is ALWAYS in the laundry. C'est la vie!

    No 7 - yep - where did the last of the herrings go when I wanted a late evening snack last night The culprit won't be reading this, sadly.

    No 9 absolutely - don't all thse people have lives of their own that they are hooked on? Which brings me to my own pet hate (and I realise I may get shouted down on this) people who spend their lives, when not watching reality shows, Twattering. ((Yes it is a deliberate typo)

    WHO CARES what you had for breakfast/lunch/dinner or who you slept with last night??????? Very Sad People.

    That's my rant over for today (tis week?) from a damp drizzly Monday in Paris. xoxoxo

  2. Mine is possibly internet fantasists.

  3. Agree so much about "People who have no manners/lack of common courtesy" and also #1, but think this is an especially annoying subset of #2. But have to admit that I'm not very good at responding to emails and texts. If I don't reply immediately, I probably won't get round to it at all. Ooops...

    Also mostly agree with but am somewhat guilty of #5. I take my own bags for food shopping and since they start processing your groceries while you're still loading the conveyor belt, I'm still scrambling to clear the bagging backlog when the time comes to pay and don't have my purse to hand.